Dear April

This is my open letter to April (yes the month).

 

Dear April,

The year has gone by so fast and we will be seeing each other in a couple of days. How have you been? I have been well. You know, the last time you came around I wasn’t in the best of state. And, lets be completely honest here, I might still not be. But we live, learn, and move on right?

The flowers have been blooming for you in the wait of your arrival. How do you feel about that? I think a lot of people under estimate you. What happens in April? Almost nothing. But I want to be kind to you in the hopes that you will show that in return. #karma

I ask of you, April, if you can bring happiness. Maybe if its just a glimpse of it? Let me know that it’s real. Take care of my friends and family as well. I know they will be well in your hands. Can you take care of me? Can you bring me Patience? Do you know him? Patience and I have been distant for a while. Can you rebuild that bridge?

This could be irrelevant to you, but like, could you possibly bring me more youtube subs? hahhahahahaha lol jk you don’t have to but like if you want to it would be nice you know.  

I don’t know what else to ask for honestly. I have a feeling this year you will be significant in my life. You will leave a mark and it wont hurt. Lets have fun April. Lets do things we never done before. Lets explore, laugh, and live life. I know you and I are capable of so much more. Lets show the world what we are capable of when we work together. Lets do it. Lets do this. Lets live

Love, 

Peter


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If You Want To Jump, I’ll Jump With You

I am a free, walking, on the go psychiatrist. There is no need to give me money or even ask for a way to compensate me because I am free.

 

That’s what people think. First of all, I am no where near a psychiatrist. Second, I don’t have no knowledge what so ever regarding anything basically. And third, my life is already screwed up as it is to be dealing with other peoples baggage or crap.

 

But what do people do? Well, they still go ahead and pull up a chair and willingly spill out all their demons for me to hear. Ok, maybe its my fault. I am really nice, and I have been told I am a great listener. Which is very true. I like listening to people, But I also like to communicate with them as well. Like a game of catch you know? You throw the ball back and forth. That’s how a good conversation should go.

Today, one of my coworkers that I have known for a while was telling me about all her troubles. Since we were at work she didn’t express herself just how she wanted to but I could see that all she wanted to do at that moment is cry out of frustration. I’ve been there before and girl let me tell you, I had no one. Wish I had but at the same time not, because eww, no one needs to see me crying.

I felt bad that I couldn’t do anything to help her (like c’mon, I do have a heart here). But at the same time she got herself in the hole she is drowning in. Look, I’m not the best for all the motivational crap stuff, don’t get me wrong I love to hear it, I just don’t know how to share it and pump some up or get them to move away from the cliff. My best motivational advice would be “if you want to jump I’ll jump with you.” Hell, to be completely honest I’d probably end up jumping first.

Today though, I was hit by the Motivational Spirit God. Let me tell you why. I told my coworker that even though it seemed like her world was going to be over, it was only a part of her life that she was currently living. And just like those happy moments she had in the past that ended, these tough times were also going to end.

WOW, I know right? What did I  have for breakfast today? I also told her to not give up. Giving up is one of the worst things we can do, and even though its the easiest thing and the option that is right there at our grasp, its not the right one. She smiled at me and proceeded to do what she had to do. In my  opinion those words I said deserved a hug, but that’s neither here nor there.

In the end, what I’m trying to get at is that I am always there to listen to people. And even though sometimes I get tired of their problems it does make me see that I am not the only one. We are all going through crap and it smells really bad. You know what we have to do? Help each other out bro! Sometimes, and I have noticed this in myself, when you help other people while you have problems you feel way better. Sure, you may not be able to take them away but at least you helped them see a brighter better edited picture, you know?

If I’m not making any sense, I’m sorry. Just go help someone feel better. OK? That’s basically it. Even if its you. Go smile in the mirror. Tell yourself you did a good job today. Look, you made it. You’re alive and breathing. You are unstoppable and I believe in you.

Gee, you know what?I just might change my “profession” from free psychiatrist to motivational speaker.


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This Is My Journal Blog

We have hit a mile stone! As of today, yes, today. Write it down on your calendar because it is important to me. I have my own domain! *insert cheers here*.

 

The other day I was wondering through the internet (as one millennial would do) and as I approached my blog, I was not logged into word press. I wanted to see what the reader sees when they click on my blog. Well, what I found was horrendous. I almost had a heart attack. There were so many ads.

 

Was I promoting what ever it was you were seeing? No. Was I making money off of that? No. That’s why I was shook. I literally fell out of my chair. If there are going to be ads on my page then you bet your little smooth bottom I’m going to be profiting off of those, so when you see them in the future click on them and help me make a living ok? OK. Just kidding, wordpress please don’t sue me.

 

I have been on this site for a little over 2 years now. This is actually my third year on this site. Don’t you think its time we make some changes? Sure the “don’t fix whats not broke” thing might come in here but change is good. Well some change, like this change. Ok, I’m not making any sense but you get the picture, right?

 

Any ways, welcome once again to my official Blog.

 

*Cuts ribbon*

*Champagne bottle pop noise thingy*


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Game Plan

Ok, so I have a game plan (I think).

 

Yesterday I had what someone would call an epiphany. But what do I call it? I call it a wake up call from my stupidity. I am fat. Lets just get straight to the point here. Don’t sit there and tell me other wise, because you can’t see me, and honestly that’s a good thing. You should be grateful. You should pray to God or what ever you do and feel blessed you can’t see aaaall this.

Also, don’t come at me with the whole, you should love yourself just the way you are BS. Because, I do. I do love myself. That’s why I always buy myself food and please my taste buds like I do. Its not that I care what other people say either because I high key don’t anymore. But at the same time I don’t want to look like a fat pig either you know?

Ok, all physical appearances aside, lets talk about the health side of this. I get heartburn maybe about seven times a day. That’s not ok because it means I’m harboring battery acid in my stomach or something and it needs to stop. ASAP. I am buying about 30$ worth of anti acids a month and that money can be going to something else. Plus, I’m constantly weak. I get tired so fast, I have no endurance what so ever. I tried to pick up some cardboard today at work and I needed to sit down and meditate afterwards because I felt like I was about to get a hemorrhoid or pull a muscle.

So what am I going to do? Well, after researching and coming to the horrid conclusion that I can not afford any type of surgery, I have decided that I have to take this matter into my own hands. No, I will not be preforming surgery on myself, silly goose. I will be, ugh, dare I say it… “eating healthy and exercising.”

I know that the first step is the hardest. So, what I have made is a list. A list of things that I will not eat. I didn’t go all hardcore on it either or else I might go crazy and bite a live cow or something. I also told my self that I will be going walking every single day for two weeks straight. Just to see if I see a change. I REALLY WANT TO SEE A CHANGE. I’ll take it slow the first couple of days (because I am slow). And I will try my best to keep it up.

I live in So Cal (that’s California, us hipsters call it that ….hahah..ha). So technically it’s summer here already. Summer started the last time it rained. Its been an average of 75 degrees this whole week. Its only going to get hotter and I want to be able to show off my rockin’ hot bod. “But, Peter! You should feel comfortable in your own skin,” you said. You’re right. And I do, but I’m an attention whore not really but yeah and I want to be complimented, so there’s that.


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I Need To Start A Diet

There’s no way of saying this so I’m just going go out there and grab the bull by the horns and say it. I need to start a diet. I realized this today in the morning. I was thinking about all the time I spend editing my videos and I always get mad when I see my double chin. I mean c’mon it’s not a pleasant thing to see.

 

I know I’m no fat. Every single person that I tell that I need to lose weight always jumps straight to, “you’re not fat! You’re tall so you hide it well.” Um, ok? What does that even mean? Are all tall people supposed to be fat? Or not supposed to be? I’m not even trying to hide anything either. So if I was short then what would be the comment? Oh yeah you do have to lose weight, you’re short and it doesn’t look good on you. But since I’m a freaking giraffe, all is good in the world. Maybe I’m hiding my fat in my neck and people can’t notice my double chin because there on the ground and I’m (according to some people) a walking skyscraper. I’m not even that tall bro.

 

Thinking about eating right and exercising  gives me the chills. I have goosebumps on my arms right now just writing this. I hate eating healthy. I love my burgers and chips. Lets not even get into the candy because I will fight someone. And exercising? Well, its not too bad. I just never have time or don’t know where to go.

 

Last year I went to the gym and got addicted. I remember I did like it. Would I go back to the same one? I don’t think so. Am I going to find a new place? Maybe. I need something closer to home. Or maybe just buy some equipment at home and use it there. Not sure, but something has to change. This double chin that I have now has to evacuate up off my face.


 

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We Put In Work

I know I talked crap about my boss yesterday, and today I have a little more dirt to throw her way, but it’s all because she set me up for failure.

 

As you know (or will now) I cover her meetings when she isn’t there. Today she called me in the morning saying how the 10 o’clock meeting had been canceled. I said ok great, I didn’t really want to go anyways. I never do. I asked one of the other managers just to verify. He said that there was in fact still a meeting.

 

Whats going on? Why is she setting me up for failure? The managers will be wondering why I didn’t go to the meeting when they saw me out on the floor. Now, I wonder. Was this her plan? To come back on Monday and be asked why I didn’t go and her to throw me under he bus like that? Hmmm well it didn’t work.

 

I still ended up going to the meeting and it was almost 2 hours. It wasn’t as bad as it was I thought it was going to be. Just at the end when everyone was leaving I got put on blast by the big boss (general manager) saying how when my boss isn’t there that we basically don’t do anything. Um ok sure, if that’s what people tell you that’s fine. First check your facts bruh. We put in work, well, sometimes.

 

Let me tell you, two of my coworkers love to talk. When I say love to talk I mean LOVE to talk. Any one they see they will stop and talk to. I honestly think they would even stop and talk to a wall if they had an option. That slows us down so much. And gets who gets to hear it  when the boss comes back. ME.

 

So I told one of them that they needed to basically get with it and actually work. I was frustrated and tired so I know for a fact I might have said it in a negative way. No, I know for a fact that I did, and my intention was to hurt, so I should apologize to be honest but we’ll see where that boat floats to.

 

This is where I understand my boss. She doesn’t want to get scolded from her boss so she pushed us to try to be our best. Sure, she really doesn’t have any people skills but still she’s trying her best, you know?

 

I feel the same way right now. I don’t want to go in on Monday and be yelled at because we didn’t do anything today. It’s a pyramid. An awful one. That’s just how it is though. I’m glad it’s the weekend. I can’t wait to sit around and do nothing 🙂 .

 


 

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What Can You Do?

Today was a good day until the last two hours. Let me explain. My boss yesterday asked if we wanted to stay two hours over time. Since we all hate working there with a passion, of course we all said no thanks.  To this she said, “ok I’ll just mandate it for tomorrow.” Gee ok then. That means she was going to make it mandatory and we all had no option of leaving.

 

So today in the morning, she said that if we each finished certain tasks that we would be able to leave at the usual time.  GUESS WHAT HAPPENED AT THE END OF THE DAY? Well, we finished our tasks, and in my point of view, we even did more than what we actually needed to do. But, she told all of us that we had to stay at least an hour. Ok sure not bad, but the fact that she just randomly decides these things like that buuuuuugs me sooooo much.

 

Maybe I shouldn’t be complaining, I know. At least I have a job. The demands of the job sometimes make you adjust your plans or even change them and yada yada yada. But still, I’m bugged. Then when we were leaving, I over heard (because she didn’t tell us) that she isn’t going to be at work tomorrow. Great communication. Aren’t you supposed to tell your crew that you will be out? That you want them to still do what they have to do and pull in the work? That if there is anything that they may need then they can call you? Nope. She didn’t. I don’t know she’s weird. She just makes me mad. She triggers me so much almost everyday.

 

Now, this means that I’ll have to be going to the “manager meeting” to fill in for her since I’m her second in command. I hate doing that meeting. I think I’ve talked about it countless times before, and I’ll keep talking about it until I finally quit that place. But eh. What can you do?

 

In other news, I just posted a pic on IG. Hahahaha , I feel so modern. Am I in now? Can we be friends? One of my friends saw my Youtube video and said she couldn’t stop laughing. I didn’t know if that was a compliment or not. I’m glad she liked it regardless. If you haven’t watched the video you shouldn’t because it so bad. But click here if you really need to. And follow me on my Instagram if you want to, I have no friends.

It’s Here

Yes, after maybe about two weeks it has finally arrived.I don’t know why I am putting so much emphasis on this but here it is. The YouTube video no one asked for and and no one was waiting for lol.

 

I know its not the best video on the internet. Its not the best quality either, but hey I’m starting out and its hard. No one said it was easy. Nevertheless, it was super fun making it and I really enjoyed editing it. Maybe stayed up all night twice just to get it “right”.

 

Don’t worry. The next videos I make will be better. I bought a new camera! But I’ll talk about that later.

Terms And Conditions

Ahhhhhhhh.

 

Ok ok ok. Since I have been posting all week might as well continue the streak right? So, today I’ve spent my whole freaking day researching. Yes, researching. Let me tell you why. So I’ve been watching so many YouTube tutorials on how to begin a channel and what you need to know and all that juicy stuff. The one thing that people don’t tell you is that you need to do a lot of before kind of things.

 

No one tells you that you need to have a good software editing system. No one tells you what type of camera to use. No one tells you what type of laptop to use. Everyone is more like, “this is what I use, this is what I have used in the past, you can use what ever you want.” And if you want to know what the most popular camera or editing software there is you really can’t because they all use something different.

 

Done with that rant. Any way, I spent my whole day at Starbucks just reading up on YouTube regulations and copyright laws and all that wonderful things. I think that this is the first time I actually sit down and read “Terms and Conditions” before accepting. The amount of time I spent today on this is insane but I’m for sure so into this.

 

After I noticed that my laptop that I currently own is slower then I am I decided to go get myself in debt and buy a new one. I researched this as well and asked so many questions, I think the guy helping me at best buy was annoyed but he did help a lot. (Shout out to him). I am very happy with the one I purchased. It looks really nice but I hope that it actually works like I want it too.

 

Oh, another thing I did was I downloaded Instagram and Twitter. I am no social media whore, but if I want my channel to get views and people to see me I need these platforms to grow and expand. (So go follow me! ;} I’ll let you know when I’m finished setting all that up so you can).

 

Right now I’m at Starbucks again. Don’t worry, its a different one. I set up my laptop which took a while, I’m downloading DaVinci Resolve. It is the best video editor I was able to find that is actually free. I watched some tutorials in the mean time, and I have to say it looks really high end and professional.

 

Now, for the good stuff. My first video is done. It looks like complete trash, I’m not even going to lie. But hey, its my first video and I really don’t know what I’m doing. You would think that I would delete it and just make something better. But here’s the thing. I really had so much fun filming and editing it. Since its also the very first thing I produce (dang check me out) I want everyone to see where I came from, you know when I make it big, (hahhahaha I’m just kidding). But I think you get what I mean.

That’s all for now. Don’t worry I wont bother you tomorrow with another post. I know I can get a little annoying. I’ll wait till Monday.

It’s Coming

I never thought that filming yourself and editing videos would be this tiring. Don’t get me wrong it’s supper fun. I love it. I feel like I’ve actually fallen in love again. Talking to a camera is so fun! Did I mention it’s fun?!

Let’s be cut throat honest, I know at the beginning my videos will suck, that’s to be expected. I have no clue what I’m doing. So far it’s been great, it’s been fun. I like it. It’s a good way to spend my time.

I know that maybe in the future it will be better. I’ll learn all those cool editing techniques and special or specific ways to do certain things. I might even buy a camera. That would be nice. My phone shakes as if it’s dying.

If anyone has any tips and things they’d like to share about it im more than ready to listen. But for now, be ready, because it’s coming.