Knock Knock. Who’s There? It’s Anxiety Bitch

I went to the gym today. Instead of getting off my car, like a normal person would, I stayed there in the parking lot for about 30 minutes contemplating life. Why? Well, wouldn’t we all like to know.

The cars passed by unaware of what I was going through. Its funny how the world still continues when our brains have stopped to think about nonsense. Nothing will ever be placed on hold for you, its a sad reality but its true.

I didn’t plan this sudden burst of anxiety. Like usual it comes out of the blue and its uninvited. I packed my gym bag, took my brother to his job, and then I headed to the gym with the intention to go hard and be fit. Why is it that I couldn’t get off my car?

I fucking hate anxiety. Hate it. It stops me from doing things that are so simple to some people. At the end of the day its still my fault, I haven’t been taking my medication the correct way.

SO, you can basically say that this post is pointless, “just take your god dam pills and get over yourself.” I hear you say. You have a valid point. I am self destructing at this point, I don’t even know why I do it honestly. But sometimes it sounds like there are a lot of little Me’s in my head and they all want me to do what they tell me to.

I need to get back to taking them how they are supposed to be taken. I just hate the fact that I have to depend on them or else I feel like shit.

Why can’t I just be normal like everyone else?

3 thoughts on “Knock Knock. Who’s There? It’s Anxiety Bitch

  1. You gotta change how you look at this situation. You CAN be normal, like everyone else. You just need a little bit of help in the anxiety department.

    I don’t suffer from anxiety, but I suffer from other things (ADHD being the main one) and I can also be normal like everyone else, as long as my Adderall helps me out. Sometimes your body just needs a little help to get on the good path, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with providing your body with that help. Just like you provide your physical body with the gym workout to keep in shape, you have to provide your mental self with a bit of an alteration, and that’s perfectly okay.

    Maybe set up and appointment to talk to your therapist (or the person that prescribed the medication) and let them know how you’re feeling about taking meds. We all need a little help in different areas in our life, and honestly, if something as simple as a pill a day helps you feel adjusted, then so be it.

    Liked by 1 person

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