I Was… Adulting

I was so out of this world productive yesterday. I was the guy version of Wonder Woman. Is that a thing? Or is that offensive? Either way I’m proud of myself. You should have seen me.

I got up super early, as I do, picked up my brother from his graveyard shift, and instead of crawling back into bed for an extra 40 mins, I got ready for work, when to Starbucks, and I even pumped some gas into my car! I know for some people these things might seem a little ordinary, but for me these are huge accomplishments.

I’m not even finished though. Work was slow so I did a half day. And instead of breaking the law by driving home anxiously at 90 mph I went, dare I say it, grocery shopping. Yes ma’am. I was adulting. Never thought I’d do it but I did. Bought some nice little veggies, ice cream because I enjoy being happy, and all that other random stuff you find in your fridge.

The party did not stop there no sir. After putting the groceries away, I did some laundry. Wait no correction, I did ALL my laundry. That’s right, maybe 3 weeks worth. I was out of control I know, I know.

Since I had to keep this train going, I decided to vacuum my car. Sit down this is going to sound wild. I cleaned my car. Yes that’s a true statement. I took out the trash that was starting to ferment in there (filled up a 13 gallon trash bag with trash), vacuumed, and because I was feeling a little sassy, I even waxed the seats and the dash board.

I don’t know what hit me honestly. I’m thinking there was something in that Starbucks I had. Who knows. But it was a very productive day. I rewarded myself with ice cream of course when I was done folding the laundry.

If only I was that productive all the time.


05/16/2019


Severance

Yesterday, along with all my coworkers, we found out that the company we work for is going to downsize more than half of the employees. We are currently staffed at 150 and they’re goal is to get down to 60 by July. That does not include management, which there are 15 and will go down to 3.

They explained that the company moved to the west coast here in California a while ago to supply the demands of customers here. They thought that by having the business closer to them they would profit and all. That did no work out. So they are moving back to the east coast where headquarters is currently at. There will only be one account left here in California, and the 60 people that remain will be supplying that accounts product.

There are so many questions that people have. They are concerned. I feel them. They have families, car payments, houses they just bought. But I am not that worried. I want to leave that place. If you have been reading my blog for a while now, you know how much I hate it there. And looking back at it now it all makes sense. The cut backs, the high demand in production, and the excessive firing for dumb stupid reasons.

There will be a pay out. Only a month’s worth, but still, some people are happy about that. Some people can’t wait to collect unemployment. Others, they actually want to be part of the 60 that stay. Nothing is certain. No one knows how they will be electing the people. No one knows when they will start issuing the WARN letters. Technically after they hand you that letter, 60 days from that day will be your last.

I have not heard anything from the job I interviewed at. I was worried before, but now I know that if it was meant to be it would have been. I know I have to keep trying and trying until something comes up. I do not believe in unemployment. Living off the government is not something I am ok with. I know I hate working, but everything I have I have worked for it, I am not one to get things handed to, I don’t do that.

 

But deep down inside. Some where deep deep in there, there is doubt, there is worry, and I fear when it will rise, because when it does. It’s not going to be pretty.


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Tattoo Removal

I bleeping love tattoos. I always wanted a tattoo when I was younger. I was always afraid to get one. Then when I went to college (yes I did go, it was a blink of an eye moment, but nonetheless I still went), I got my first tattoo. “Brave warrior” right on my left shoulder.

I got inspired by a Demi Lovato lyric. When I heard her song Warrior it spoke to me in the loudest way possible. I feel like I relate to that song so well because I have been through the thickest of mud and the hardest of concrete and I am still here. Sure, bruised, beat up, in pain, but HERE.

The day I got that tattoo, I nearly fainted. Or I did, can’t remember, but the rush was great. I loved it and I have loved it ever since. Then months later I got another tattoo near the crease of my arm/ elbow. In the same area I got another small tattoo in San Fran.

Those tattoos mean the world to me. They mean so much because I got them with friends that I cherish and I look back at those times and I smile because it was honestly one of the best moments in my life.

But sadly. When I went through my “I’m a virgin for God” phase I started the process of getting them removed, and till this day I still do. Even though I am getting them removed that doesn’t mean I regret them. Sounds like hypocrisy but give me a sec to explain.

Even though I go and come back from Church I still feel like getting them removed. Not the one on my shoulder though. That one is staying because it has a special meaning to me that no one can take away.

The process of getting them removed though. OMG. Ok just picture this, and this is as accurate as I can get ok? So lets just say you take a fork, yes a fork, and you go to your stove, the flames are blazing like they are welcoming you into hell, and you lay the fork there for a good ten minutes or so. Then you grab the fork, and start poking at your skin like there’s no freaking tomorrow. That’s how it feels to get a tattoo removed.

Oh, and get this, it gets better, every single time you go back it gets worse. That’s right, its like they left the dam fork an extra minute on the eternal flames of death.

Of course its not an actual fork that they use, its this little tiny cute laser that blasts into your skin. Lovely. It breaks down the ink in your skin so your body can take care of the rest and dispose of the ink when you use the Wiz Palace. It’s actually a beautiful process that lasts just about 3 years.

If you’re lucky enough maybe you had an inexperienced tattoo artist with cheap ink, so then your removal will be a walk in the park. If you went to a good tattoo artist who has amazing Mona Lisa work of arts and has that high end ink derived right from under the throne of Satan, then your walk in the park is going to be a 3 AM, getting mugged and beat up while also getting hit with a stick, then later peed on my a dog, type of walk. Wonderful.

If you want a tattoo just make sure you want that on you for the rest of your life. I know you already heard that a millions times, but I don’t give a dam bro, listen. You remember those dope shoes you bought that were over priced but you just had to have them because you wanted to be “the cool kid”. Or even if that wasn’t you, just picture those shoes or heels (for the ladies, whats up gurl) that you love, now its been years, they smell. They look worn out, they have this weird smell that is concerning, they’re drooping and now instead of “nice kicks man” you get “dang son can’t you afford new shoes?”

That’s a tattoo.


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Job Hunt Day 2

Day 2 of job hunting (don’t worry, I’m not going to make this a daily thing I don’t want to bore you to death).

 

I didn’t go to work today, I felt that it was a good decision for my mental health. I made plans already for tomorrow. I’m going to go see some puppies and have breakfast with one of my friends. But today, I came to Starbucks (my safe place) to edit. I have been here for maybe more than six hours. Not sure if they’ll kick me out but I hope they don’t.

 

I went on Craigslist to search for some local jobs. That place is freaking scary. Some how I feel like almost all those postings are all fake and are people trying to get your info. They don’t seem legit to me. Does anyone ever get a job from there? Is that site even a thing anymore? I remember growing up and always hearing about Craigslist and how people always found a job on there. Does that even happen anymore? If there’s a new site where the jobs are at, tell me! PLEASE.

 

Still waiting for my Doordash and Postmate kits to come in the mail so I can start collecting that extra money. I don’t know what else I can do in the mean time. I don’t have many bills which is good, but at the same time I need money to survive. Just going to have to keep looking.

 

For now I’m going to go eat with a friend. He goes into work a little later and since I’m not working he said he can pass by and we can eat something and chat. Should be nice. We’re trying to plan a mini two day vacation, because I really need one. So might do that.


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Job Hunt Day 1

To get a good job in today’s job market this is what you’ll need; a good resume, 25 years of experience, 73 degrees, a letter signed by the queen of England, and three strands of hair picked right from a witches mole.

If you think I’m exaggerating, I’m not. Yesterday I was looking at some postings and it seems that employers expect you to know what you will be doing on the job before you even have it. What’s up with that? I get it, it’s your company and you want the best, but no one is perfect.

Yesterday was day one of searching for a job. I’m looking at nearly anything. Jobs that are way above me, jobs that are right up my ally, and jobs that are very questionable.

I even joked to some friends that I’d be down to sell pictures of my feet, if it came down to that. I know a lot of people like that fetish type of stuff. I went a little further in saying I’d sell my used socks as well. I literally can’t find the line because I always cross it. Of course I’m not going to do that for reals… for now.

One of my friends suggested that I be a stripper. And although I’ve thought about it maybe once or nine times before. I don’t really have the body for it. Don’t get me wrong , I could get the body if I wanted to. But the face would still be the same. Ugly. But that can be covered by a mask. Masked stripper? Maybe that could be a thing? Spiral me to super stardom? Who knows. In the mean time I have to get in shape. So technically I still need a job.

Another friend suggested Doordash. Not my first option. But it’s an option nonetheless, and at least this way I won’t have to be buying socks every week. I signed up and got approved. Also signed up for Postmates. I’m desperate to leave my current job. Can’t you tell?

The thing that I don’t wnat to do is let my emotions get in the way of my thinking and quit without having a Plan B. So this is basically me “being smart”. But no doubt I will be on the search for a job that suits my needs. In the meantime I’ll be trying to keep my sanity and my composure at work. Even though I might lose one of those pretty soon.


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