I’ll Do Anything For Money

I feel like I’ve complained enough on here about how much I hate my job. So what’s next?

I was on my way to work today and told my self that’s it, I NEED to look for another job. I know, for any other sane person with a good leveled head, they might have already thought of that idea. Well, guess what? I did too. I tried in the beginning of the year but had no luck.

Maybe I didn’t try hard enough. Or maybe I did and the job market was pretty slow and low. I don’t know, what I do know is that I’m still freaking working at the same place.

Is it that hard to find a job? It might be. I have a friend who used to work at Kmart, they shut down back in December, and he has been looking for a job ever since. Sure he’s picky as heck but still, it’s almost five months, he should have found soemthing.

I don’t think I have a lot of skills or experience. I’m being brutally honest with myself here. But, I do feel I am useful for something, you know what I mean? I’ll do anything for money. Literally, that’s how much I want to leave my job.

No, but jokes aside, I really need to get my crap together and actually work on my resume and my interview answers, to make it seem that I am normal and worthy of working in a social environment with other humans.

I’d really like to be someone’s assistant. I know for some that’s a little humiliating. But for me I’d be down. Well, as long as my boss is not a total A. But beggars can’t be choosers right?

What I was thinking though. I might take the summer off. Quit my job in early summer and look for a job but also enjoy the summer. Maybe my YouTube channel will take off and I’ll be famous? I’m such a millennial, ugh I hate it.

It’s time to take action. It’s time to move. And it’s time to go places.


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Is There Such A Place ?

Yesterday after vigorously working on cutting some annoying weeds that grew in our front yard I decided to compensate myself with a nice little drink from Starbucks. There’s no other better way to pat yourself on the back right?

Blasted my music as loud as I could handle while driving there, scratch that, as loud as it went. I was freaking pumped, got my car windows tinted on Sunday and it had been a long time dream I had since I bought the car three years ago. Now since it’s paid off, and I know I’m gonna keep it, I decided to treat myself with that. And I love it.

I didn’t want to get off my car, because I’m socially awkward, so I went a little out of my way to go to a Starbucks that had a drive through. Funny thing though, if you ever got your windows tinted you know that you’re not supposed to roll down your windows. Well, my little dumb soul forgot SUNDAY NIGHT and YESTERDAY NIGHT at the Starbucks. Like wtf.

Any who, after that unfortunate event, I decide to just park and consume my Starbucks while listening to music. It was actually really relaxing. It was drizzling just a bit which made it perfect. I’m honestly tired of how much it’s been raining though. We live in California, it’s not supposed to rain here. I like the cold not the rain. Would like to live somewhere where it’s hella sunny but at the same time the wind gives you goosebumps. Is there such a place?

I don’t know where I was going with this post. Maybe it wasn’t meant to go anywhere. It’s just me rambling about nonsense. It’s all good though. The night ended very well. So that’s what counts.

Game Plan

Ok, so I have a game plan (I think).

 

Yesterday I had what someone would call an epiphany. But what do I call it? I call it a wake up call from my stupidity. I am fat. Lets just get straight to the point here. Don’t sit there and tell me other wise, because you can’t see me, and honestly that’s a good thing. You should be grateful. You should pray to God or what ever you do and feel blessed you can’t see aaaall this.

Also, don’t come at me with the whole, you should love yourself just the way you are BS. Because, I do. I do love myself. That’s why I always buy myself food and please my taste buds like I do. Its not that I care what other people say either because I high key don’t anymore. But at the same time I don’t want to look like a fat pig either you know?

Ok, all physical appearances aside, lets talk about the health side of this. I get heartburn maybe about seven times a day. That’s not ok because it means I’m harboring battery acid in my stomach or something and it needs to stop. ASAP. I am buying about 30$ worth of anti acids a month and that money can be going to something else. Plus, I’m constantly weak. I get tired so fast, I have no endurance what so ever. I tried to pick up some cardboard today at work and I needed to sit down and meditate afterwards because I felt like I was about to get a hemorrhoid or pull a muscle.

So what am I going to do? Well, after researching and coming to the horrid conclusion that I can not afford any type of surgery, I have decided that I have to take this matter into my own hands. No, I will not be preforming surgery on myself, silly goose. I will be, ugh, dare I say it… “eating healthy and exercising.”

I know that the first step is the hardest. So, what I have made is a list. A list of things that I will not eat. I didn’t go all hardcore on it either or else I might go crazy and bite a live cow or something. I also told my self that I will be going walking every single day for two weeks straight. Just to see if I see a change. I REALLY WANT TO SEE A CHANGE. I’ll take it slow the first couple of days (because I am slow). And I will try my best to keep it up.

I live in So Cal (that’s California, us hipsters call it that ….hahah..ha). So technically it’s summer here already. Summer started the last time it rained. Its been an average of 75 degrees this whole week. Its only going to get hotter and I want to be able to show off my rockin’ hot bod. “But, Peter! You should feel comfortable in your own skin,” you said. You’re right. And I do, but I’m an attention whore not really but yeah and I want to be complimented, so there’s that.


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Attempt To Leave My Current Job

Today, in a lame attempt to leave my current job, I had an interview at a UPS store were one of my friends works at. It was an interesting interview I’d say.

It went as usual. The usual questions were asked. A great convo was had between the manager of the store and I. Everything in the interview would give off the impression as if everything was perfect. But I have concerns.

First off, the pay is minimum wage. Here in California (USA) , that’s eleven American dollars. I would receive a major pay cut. Where I work at now I get paid pretty well.

Second, is work less hours. Although I don’t actually mind that, take in mind I’d be paid less, so then also working less hours, I would have a non existent paycheck by the end of the pay period.

Third, I’d have to work Saturdays. There’s something about having the weekend off that I just love. I used to work at McDonald’s and I never knew what that was like. I enjoy my weekends. Even though I don’t have a life, I still wish to have no life with weekends off.

The job is not right for me. But, I’m very optimistic that pretty soon, something will come along. And if not, then it’s a new adventure I’m willing to embark.

Calm

Relax.

Breathe in and out. Feel the sand run through your toes. Feel the rays of the sun jump on your skin and gracefully caress your face. You hear the waves of the ocean splash against the shore. People laughing. Kids playing in the sand. And it’s calm. It’s all calm.

You remember what it’s like being a kid. You remember how you father helped you get up when you first fell off your bike. You remember your mom teaching you how to tie your shoes. You remember how much fun you had in school. How you couldn’t wait to go back. You remember how you never fought with your friends. And when you did, did you remember the next day? No.

You suddenly feel that feeling you felt when you were young on Sunday mornings. Waiting for a bright future. You remember those waffles that only your mom knew how to make. How your dad loved football and always had snacks on Sundays. You remember feeling warm every Christmas Eve. And you couldn’t wait for New Years to come around to finally stay up past your bed time.

The candy’s on halloween and valentines. Your first crush. Your first love. You breathe in and smell that first day of school smell. That first car you bought with your own money.

Everything is calm.

You run your hands through the oceans sands and remember how it felt to always have your blanket. How it protected you from the monsters and the ghouls. How it felt hugging your dad when he came home. How it felt holding your first loves hand. In the winter it was cold, and in the summer you would just high five.

You open your eyes. The ocean is blue and the sky is a piercing orange. The end of another day. Just to be soon the beginning of another. The water waves at you. You wave back, and everything is calm.


Yesterday I went to the beach. It was a small day-cation. I really needed it. And I had the time of my life.