I’m Just Saying

It’s Valentine’s Day. (Sigh) I know, I know, if you’re single you could care less, or maybe you’re with someone and don’t care about it at all. Or maybe you’re like me and have a mixed feeling about it. What ever your mentality may be about it, it’s here, you like it or not.

There has been a lot of hate towards this day, and I’ve seen a lot of it. Not necessarily from single people but from people who are “above us all” and think they have won at life or something (I don’t really know, they’re entitled, ask them).

Yes, it’s over commercialized, and yes, it shouldn’t be the only day you profess your love to your significant other. But doesn’t every other holiday do that?

If you feel that Valentine’s Day is another day for companies to make money, don’t you feel the same way about Christmas? Thanksgiving? Halloween? No? But I bet your ass still goes out and buys a tree, you still go out and treat or treat. You still invite family over and eat a big fat bird. So I’m sitting here asking you, why you hating on V day bruh? (Maybe you just need a hug?)

Can’t you give presents out any other time of the year? Why does it have to be Christmas? You can’t give thanks unless you’re sitting across from that one aunt that judges all of your life decisions? You can’t be “spooky” or watch a scary movie unless it’s The Witching Hour of October?

I’m just saying ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ . You don’t have to celebrate anything if you’re complaining that it’s just another ploy for companies to make money off of you. Either way they still do, just on different holidays, didn’t think about that did you? 😌

Now, this is all coming from someone who all his life couldn’t even celebrate the sun coming up in the morning because only ‘god’ deserved the glory (cults… they’re fun), so you might understand why I appreciate almost every holiday there is out there. Because at one point in my life I couldn’t.

Even when I was single I would sit hours day dreaming about the day that I could have a valentine. Never in those wildest dreams did I ever think it would come to reality.

So you’ll have to excuuuuse me as I gather my chocolates and flowers that I bought at an unreasonably amount and go enjoy this day with my Boyfriend.

First Thanksgiving

This will be my very first Thanksgiving I will be celebrating. It’s really the year of firsts isn’t it?

My boyfriend invited me to his families Thanksgiving a couple weeks ago. I was really excited when he did. Everything that involves him and spending time with him makes me happy.

I am nervous though. I am not good at meeting new people. I have only met one of his sisters and when I say ‘met’ I mean it very loosely. I have also met his mom and stepdad, but the only words we have ever exchanged is hello and goodbye when I’m leaving and they happen to be in the living room.

I’m usually the quite one in the group when meeting new people. I need to see who they are, I need to feel the environment, I need to fell safe. If not then I’ll go into my shell. There are times when surprisingly I will be the most talkative. Usually that’s with my friends.

The thing is that all his family will be there. I don’t know them, I don’t know how they function. Plus, this is the first Thanksgiving I will be attending so its new all together.

I’m scared yes, but at the same time I’m excited. I want to be happy, I want to live my life.

 

Don’t Compare Me To Your Friends

Ok let’s rant shall we?

I had a totally different post planned for today but some events made me change my mind.

So I have this friend that has been there for me for a while now. I love her to death and I would do anything for her. I always forgave her when she canceled and stood me up. Plus, I would always listen to her problems and try my best to help her out. I truly cared for her. She was one of the people that really helped me get me out of my shell and explore and be more out there.

So I bought Escape tickets with her. It’s a rave type of concert for Halloween. I am very excited because I love Halloween! Plus music and good vibes, bring it in.

Today though. She was telling me all the things she’s planning which is cool. I really appreciate that. I do. I like to be ready for things, at the same time sometimes I like to just go for it. I know she’s been to raves and I know she has experience, but she’s being to much right now.

I told her something and she said that her boyfriends is that once and then she didn’t have a good time. Or other times I’ll say something and she’ll immediately say that her friends did that and that this happened. So, me, getting mad at her told her exactly don’t fucking compare me to your friends.

And it’s true she does that all the time. She replays all the scenarios that she’s ever had with her friends and puts me in there. First of all, I’m nothing like her other friends, second of all I’m a different person so the scenarios will be different. She finds that hard to understand.

She straight out came at me. Told me that I was being rude basically and that she has been there for me and blah blah, ok true that doesn’t give you authority over me though. Then she said that who ever I was hanging out with was now changing me.

Um no, I’m finally living a happy life and you’re going to come and tell me I’ve changed? Oh have I changed because I’m not doing what you want me to do? Because I’m not following over for you? Excuse me but Fuck You. That’s the old me, this is the new me. I’m doing me and I’m doing it well. Like, I love her to death but she has to wake up from her dream.