Severance

Yesterday, along with all my coworkers, we found out that the company we work for is going to downsize more than half of the employees. We are currently staffed at 150 and they’re goal is to get down to 60 by July. That does not include management, which there are 15 and will go down to 3.

They explained that the company moved to the west coast here in California a while ago to supply the demands of customers here. They thought that by having the business closer to them they would profit and all. That did no work out. So they are moving back to the east coast where headquarters is currently at. There will only be one account left here in California, and the 60 people that remain will be supplying that accounts product.

There are so many questions that people have. They are concerned. I feel them. They have families, car payments, houses they just bought. But I am not that worried. I want to leave that place. If you have been reading my blog for a while now, you know how much I hate it there. And looking back at it now it all makes sense. The cut backs, the high demand in production, and the excessive firing for dumb stupid reasons.

There will be a pay out. Only a month’s worth, but still, some people are happy about that. Some people can’t wait to collect unemployment. Others, they actually want to be part of the 60 that stay. Nothing is certain. No one knows how they will be electing the people. No one knows when they will start issuing the WARN letters. Technically after they hand you that letter, 60 days from that day will be your last.

I have not heard anything from the job I interviewed at. I was worried before, but now I know that if it was meant to be it would have been. I know I have to keep trying and trying until something comes up. I do not believe in unemployment. Living off the government is not something I am ok with. I know I hate working, but everything I have I have worked for it, I am not one to get things handed to, I don’t do that.

 

But deep down inside. Some where deep deep in there, there is doubt, there is worry, and I fear when it will rise, because when it does. It’s not going to be pretty.


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Look For A Job While You Have A Job

The rumors are true. As you may or may not (or now will now) know. I was off for two days. And during those days I missed so much information.

One, the company I work for is broke. You can buy a stock for just about 20 american dollars. Second, everyone is quitting and getting another job.

Ok, lets take this one step at a time. So how is my work broke? I don’t have the least amount of clue. Last year the company itself with all its subsidiaries was worth 17 billion dollars. But some how, the stocks have dropped almost 30% a month in the past three months. I was unaware of this. And by the looks of it so were all my other coworkers. I don’t know why no one saw it coming since they were being really stingy with money and laying people off, but that’s none of my business.

My work had a “town hall” meeting where the General Manager proceeded to advice everyone that is it better to “look for a job, while you have a job.” I got a text from a coworker last week about this lovely quote that was said to them and since it was out of context I thought he was threatening everyone jobs.

Now going back to work and getting all the sides from the story I can see why he said it. He’s even worried that our site will be shut down. And if you want my honest opinion, it probably should. There are more than 20 claims that come in a week from customers that are missing product or don’t actually get what they asked for. Not to mention the management sucks in every way, shape, and form.

Second thing, almost no one was at work today. I’v never seen my job so empty. I’m thinking that most people called off to go job hunt after being told that the place that they work at might be shutting down soon. I’m glad I have been looking for a new job. But at the same time, nothing is coming in, yet. 

Regardless of this place closing or not, I want to leave. If I am still there when it does, I don’t even care, but I don’t want to let that happen.

So excuse me while I continue to devour the internet in search of a better place to work.


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I Don’t Care

Today I didn’t want to get up, oh boy didn’t I want to get up! I woke up early as hell. I don’t even know why, just opened my eyes looked at the time and was like dam it. Tried going back to sleep but got stressed I wouldn’t wake up. I still got up and went to work.

On my way to work I almost cried. I was on the verge of tears the whole ride there. I almost drove off the road and crashed just to avoid the fact that I had to go to work. I regretted even getting up in the first place, I wanted to turn back time and just call off.

As soon as I got to work, my mood changed. I have no idea where it went, who took it, or how I came to stumble upon a better mood. But it just happened.

I think it was my I don’t care attitude. I just didn’t care. What ever happened, I didn’t care. getting yelled at? I didn’t care. My boss being her usual annoying self? I didn’t care. It saved me a huge head ache. Not caring about anything really saves you energy.

But it sucks that I still have to work here. I swear I don’t care about it. I’m not even trying anymore. I’m just a body, I’m just a number in that place.

I forgot where I was going with this. Maybe I just wanted to rant. Or maybe I just wanted to let a little bit of frustration out. One of my friends says that I’m not fine. I told him that I am. I’m peachy. I’m wonderful. Aside form work I don’t have any other complaints. I don’t care about work.

It is what it is. I just don’t care.

Working At Home

Today was the day I was scheduled to go back to work. I had taken off work since September twenty first to take care of my mother who went through reconstruction surgery that same day. I was going to be out two weeks and a half. But seeing as she may need more assistance I asked to return to work a little later, this Monday to be exact.

Some of my coworkers who have my number have been messaging me asking me if I’m ok or if I’ll be returning. I’ve texted them back letting them know I will go back soon. I didn’t want to tell anyone that I was taking a leave of absence because, well as blunt as it sounds, it’s none of their business.

I know that sounds harsh and mean, but I don’t really have a connection to them. Sure they are my coworkers but the bond or relationship I have with them is just merely related to work. There was only about two of them that I actually did tell what was going on. I’m sure I’m the talk of the town, probably asking themselves where I am or if I’m returning, or even what happened to me in the first place. Some might even think I quit. Surprise they will get when they see me walk in Monday.

I do have to say that even though I’ve been up and down with hospital visits, cleaning and cooking, and taking care of my mother, I have enjoyed this time off. Working at home is far different from working at a job. The thought of returning does not amuse me at all.

As a matter of fact, today while buying groceries, I saw a coworker. I asked her how she was and how things at work were going. By the looks of it, they’re not going so well. Things have changed and by the expression on her face and her tone of voice, they haven’t changed for the better.

Just to confirm my doubts I messaged a close coworker and she said that everything I heard was correct, and maybe even worse. If I didn’t want to go back then, imagine how I feel now? It seems like the big boss wants numbers, and he’s going to get them at who’s ever expense.

Fight For It

I got my offer letter.

The company that we are transitioning finally offered me a pay if I were to convert to them. I knew what I was trying. That’s not what I wanted.

I walked into the general managers office about an hour ago. He say me down and explained to me what I was going to be given. I made a few questions as to why I was going to be paid so little.

Now, I’m not usually greedy, but I know my worth. I do so much for current company and I wasn’t getting paid for it. Plus, I want to add that I have been on a new mentality. The mentality that I will no longer be a pushover. I will be confident, I will be strong.

Because I made some questions, he called in the HR. She pulled me into her office and explained why I was going to be paid that amount. I told her no. I didn’t know if I was gonna get a higher offer but I did know I was going to fight for it.

Sooner than later she said ok, and they gave me what I was asking for. I was surprised with myself. I didn’t think they would just go with the flow like that. But I’m glad they did.

So now I sit here, in a clinic waiting to get drug tested, that’s a requirement, then they will send the results over to my HR and by then I’ll have my back ground checked and I will be part of the company in June.

I Don’t Want To Be Boring

I’m sitting at work currently day dreaming of a better place. I know in my last post I was talking about living on the beach. The thing is that I feel like I need change in my life. I have been doing the same routine for a while and I’m feeling bored.

Its most likely just me. But still, do you wake up every morning ready to go do the same boring shit every day? That’s what I feel I do. I know I shouldn’t be complaining and technically I’m not, I’m just venting, a lot of other people would love to be doing what I do or at least be in the position that I am now.

But, is it wrong to want change? Is It wrong to want to be doing something different? I want to learn new things and go to unfamiliar places. Is it wrong to want to aspire to be more than what I am now?

Most people would most likely say that I should go back to school and get a degree and work hard to get an excellent job and live life like everyone else on this planet. But, dude like did you even read what I just wrote. I don’t want to be boring!

Not that my life is that boring, it’s really not but the day to day, work, and everything in between is just so bland. I need adventure, I need excitement, I need change.

Got My Dolla

Money moves people. If I ask you to help me cross the street you would probably say, it’s not that hard to cross the fucking street bruh. But if were to give you 5,000 dollars in cash and ask you for help, you would probably stop traffic for me and more. Truth?

My job in logistics is going through a employer change and people are demanding a raise in order to stay. Some people have already left, some have already been hired.

I will be one of the last ones to be hired and I’m not salty about that. It’s cool, I get to observe carefully how and what’s going on.

For example, some people got offered a 10 cent raise. And like a little kid offered a simple lollipop they said yes. I ain’t about that life. Maybe it’s the Cardi B in me or my strive to be more but I said hell nah.

I saw the general manager, a chance, an opportunity and I took it. I talked to him. Told him I do way to much to be offered just some piece of shit offer. I saw he was surprised buy my boldness. And trust me, I’m not a stand-up-for-yourself kind of person.

But for once I did what I had to do and I got my dolla.

Not Working Makes Me Happy

I’m sitting here in a room I don’t want to be in. Tapping on keys and looking into a computer when I could instead be having fun with my best friend. It’s The Weekend. It’s the time where everyone should be out having fun. Doing important things with family. Spending time with people that actually mean something, not sitting in room full of nobodies.

I could literally get up, grab my things, and leave and never come back. This is my second job. I got this job to help me out with the bills. But is it worth it? I ask myself every time I come here. Is it worth the stress? Is it worth the time I miss out with family and friends?

It’s frustrating going back and forth in what I want. Do I want to be here? Do I need the money? What will happen when I quit?

When I first go here today I put it in my head that tomorrow I wasn’t going to show up. I wasn’t going to show up, call, or do anything. I was so mind set into just abandoning this job. But now, as I think more rationally, I find it hard to believe I could do that.

Is it bad? Or is it spontaneous? Will it affect me later? I don’t know. I just know that I need to stop. Working two jobs, paying bills, being The Man, is really fucking tiring. Can I take anymore of it? I’m not happy. I want to be happy. And as funny as it sounds, not working makes me happy.

It’s Cut Throat Or Get Cut

Change is good. I like change. But what happens when the change turns your world upside down? When you get stuck in the moment and have to realize what’s going on before you can take that one step in the right direction.

I work in logistics. In simple terms, a Warehouse. It’s not glamorous. But it’s not a piece of shit place either. I like it. Not small but not too big. I like what I do.

Inventory.

I was just recently promoted to a position that has more responsibilities but isn’t too complicated or stressing. Everything was working out fine. But business is business. It’s cut throat or get cut. Live or die. And I’ve been dying.

Today they moved someone from another department to mine. And recently they brought in a supervisor form another site in to mine as well. Both will be training to be my bosses.

How do you train someone to be your boss? It’s not fair. Why can’t I just have the position. Or why didn’t they just leave the guy where he was. Everything was cool. Everything was fine.

Now it’s not.

My mind switches sides from teaching them everything I know to trying to keep things to myself to still be valuable. Because once everyone knows what you know who’s to say they they still need you? You are replaceable by the snap of a finger.

Business is business. I shouldn’t take things personal. This is the way it usually works. When it’s not you it’s someone else. Life isn’t fair. Do I have to lie to make my way through life? Are there things I’m doing wrong? Friends I do not have in high places? Asses that aren’t being kissed?

Well, excuse me but I don’t play fake. I don’t play games. I don’t beg.

Let my work speak for itself, and they can’t hear it. I’ll find someone who will.

Look What You Made Me Do

I made it out alive this week! Even though it was tough week I still made it out feeling satisfied. Friday was very stressful and I have to vent, so I’m sorry but here it is.

Since the department that sends things out at work is really heavy with orders, management decided to make everyone else do four hours of over time to help them out. Since I have another job I chose to two hours one day and the other two on a different day.

Friday was one of those days. And I was so tired from the whole week, like I had been sleeping four hours a day. I asked my lead if it was ok to go home after my eight hours. She said no, and them she asked our manager and apparently he also said no.

This pissed me off so much because she gets treated like a queen and no one says anything. Plus she had left early two weeks ago along with someone else on our department.

There is so much favoritism at this work place that I can’t stand it. So now, I’m done giving my all, I’m finished doing all the dirty work for them. I am the one that does the most in that department and I’m done being taken advantage. I’m finished being the nice guy.

This is all part of the new me. And its not my fault, this is what they made me do.