I Was… Adulting

I was so out of this world productive yesterday. I was the guy version of Wonder Woman. Is that a thing? Or is that offensive? Either way I’m proud of myself. You should have seen me.

I got up super early, as I do, picked up my brother from his graveyard shift, and instead of crawling back into bed for an extra 40 mins, I got ready for work, when to Starbucks, and I even pumped some gas into my car! I know for some people these things might seem a little ordinary, but for me these are huge accomplishments.

I’m not even finished though. Work was slow so I did a half day. And instead of breaking the law by driving home anxiously at 90 mph I went, dare I say it, grocery shopping. Yes ma’am. I was adulting. Never thought I’d do it but I did. Bought some nice little veggies, ice cream because I enjoy being happy, and all that other random stuff you find in your fridge.

The party did not stop there no sir. After putting the groceries away, I did some laundry. Wait no correction, I did ALL my laundry. That’s right, maybe 3 weeks worth. I was out of control I know, I know.

Since I had to keep this train going, I decided to vacuum my car. Sit down this is going to sound wild. I cleaned my car. Yes that’s a true statement. I took out the trash that was starting to ferment in there (filled up a 13 gallon trash bag with trash), vacuumed, and because I was feeling a little sassy, I even waxed the seats and the dash board.

I don’t know what hit me honestly. I’m thinking there was something in that Starbucks I had. Who knows. But it was a very productive day. I rewarded myself with ice cream of course when I was done folding the laundry.

If only I was that productive all the time.


05/16/2019


If You Want To Jump, I’ll Jump With You

I am a free, walking, on the go psychiatrist. There is no need to give me money or even ask for a way to compensate me because I am free.

 

That’s what people think. First of all, I am no where near a psychiatrist. Second, I don’t have no knowledge what so ever regarding anything basically. And third, my life is already screwed up as it is to be dealing with other peoples baggage or crap.

 

But what do people do? Well, they still go ahead and pull up a chair and willingly spill out all their demons for me to hear. Ok, maybe its my fault. I am really nice, and I have been told I am a great listener. Which is very true. I like listening to people, But I also like to communicate with them as well. Like a game of catch you know? You throw the ball back and forth. That’s how a good conversation should go.

Today, one of my coworkers that I have known for a while was telling me about all her troubles. Since we were at work she didn’t express herself just how she wanted to but I could see that all she wanted to do at that moment is cry out of frustration. I’ve been there before and girl let me tell you, I had no one. Wish I had but at the same time not, because eww, no one needs to see me crying.

I felt bad that I couldn’t do anything to help her (like c’mon, I do have a heart here). But at the same time she got herself in the hole she is drowning in. Look, I’m not the best for all the motivational crap stuff, don’t get me wrong I love to hear it, I just don’t know how to share it and pump some up or get them to move away from the cliff. My best motivational advice would be “if you want to jump I’ll jump with you.” Hell, to be completely honest I’d probably end up jumping first.

Today though, I was hit by the Motivational Spirit God. Let me tell you why. I told my coworker that even though it seemed like her world was going to be over, it was only a part of her life that she was currently living. And just like those happy moments she had in the past that ended, these tough times were also going to end.

WOW, I know right? What did I  have for breakfast today? I also told her to not give up. Giving up is one of the worst things we can do, and even though its the easiest thing and the option that is right there at our grasp, its not the right one. She smiled at me and proceeded to do what she had to do. In my  opinion those words I said deserved a hug, but that’s neither here nor there.

In the end, what I’m trying to get at is that I am always there to listen to people. And even though sometimes I get tired of their problems it does make me see that I am not the only one. We are all going through crap and it smells really bad. You know what we have to do? Help each other out bro! Sometimes, and I have noticed this in myself, when you help other people while you have problems you feel way better. Sure, you may not be able to take them away but at least you helped them see a brighter better edited picture, you know?

If I’m not making any sense, I’m sorry. Just go help someone feel better. OK? That’s basically it. Even if its you. Go smile in the mirror. Tell yourself you did a good job today. Look, you made it. You’re alive and breathing. You are unstoppable and I believe in you.

Gee, you know what?I just might change my “profession” from free psychiatrist to motivational speaker.


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Make A Batter You

Working out.

I love working out, now. I remember once I was terrified of going to the gym and I dreaded sweating. As soon as I would break into sweat I felt like I was doing too much and needed to stop. It’s not even that to be completely honest, it’s just the fact of not feeling comfortable being looked at while I was sweating.

One of my friends was telling me the other day how she sometimes has no energy for the gym. I know how she feels, when I first started going to the gym I went, not because I wanted to go, but because I was paying for it and I’m not one to waste money and not get out what I put in.

I was never a, omg I have to go to the gym today or I’m going to die, type of person. I hated the gym. When I was younger I would ask myself why people would go to a public place and present themselves in such a way. When I (rarely) worked out at home I never liked anyone watching me. I would hide or lift weights when everyone was sleeping. Of course, that never did work because I never stuck to it and I would always stop.

So, when I bought the membership to the gym I go to now, never did I think I would end up loving it. I’m also not one of those insanely toned guys either, (I wish). I go because I want to do it for my health and I care about it too. Plus it makes me feel really good.

Ok, yes, at first it was such a hassle. I would go and feel like crap looking at other people doing way better than me. Smiling while they look at themselves in the mirror seeing their progress, meanwhile I was over here trying to hide my fat with layers of clothes. But that’s not the way I should have been seeing those people, or even myself. I wasn’t at their level. I’m still not at their level, will I ever be? No. That is their level, I have my own level.

You can’t expect going to the gym you will be walking out like those models on the magazines. That’s not true. If you go to the gym go for yourself. To make a better you. Not to look like somebody else. Those people live at the gym, you have a life to live and things to do. They spend hours and hours in the gym, it’s their job, we go maybe at most two hours a day so it’s unreal if we believe that in a month we’ll look like them.

If that’s your goal then you need to be patient but still think that you can do it, because you can. You just need to motivate yourself in the correct way.

For instance right now my motivation is Escape. I’m wearing a curtain costume and I want to feel hot in it. I want to turn heads. Yes that maybe conceded of me but it makes me feel good. Not that they are looking at me but even before I step out I look in the mirror and just feel good. Everyone else should too. Life is too short to feel like crap and not go out. Even if I didn’t like the way I looked I’m still gonna go out and rock it because I need to live life I need to have fun. The gym has given me so much more confidence, and I needed that.