Second First Date

Grab your cups because I’m about to pour some dam good tea. Grab your cookies and your napkins because this is going to get messy.

I met him on tinder. We had a date planned for yesterday but we actually met last Friday at a club. In our defense, the club was not even a date that we planned it just happened and I am glad that it did happen. You can learn a lot from a person when alcohol lets them say anything and makes the real them come out.

Yesterday was the day. I was so thrilled. I really liked this guy and I thought that we had a really good chance of connecting and actually being a great couple. I still think that to this day.

I got off work and then took a shower and headed straight to his house. I got there pretty late because of traffic and also there was an accident that blocked off the main roads. Nonetheless, I arrived and that’s where the story starts, right?

Well, for starters, we took one of his friends home since she was chilling at his house. (It’s not his house he only rents one room in it, you’re going to need that bit of info later, trust). After that we then headed to Chipotle. There we ate and we talked about a lot of stuff. We were there for about a little just over an hour and I have to say that I really enjoyed it.

We even got to the subject of me not being ‘out’ to my mom and church. But that is for another post (and its coming). . . However, I for the most part, thought that it was a mood killer and he was definitely thinking about dating me after that bomb shell. He’s been out since he was 13 and I thing thats pretty brave. But I’m working on it and I have been for weeks, even before him. I will come out, on my terms and at my time, and not for any one but myself.

We saw the movie Aladdin. Not one of my favorite movies, not even in the top 100 but it was ok to watch. We held hands and it was the best feeling ever knowing he still wanted me by his side. That makes me sound so middle school-ish but that’s how I genuinely felt so sue me.

On the way back to his place we saw Starbucks and we had to stop by. We both love it, me for the sugar and him for the caffeine. When we got to his house I swear it seemed like a scene form a coming of age movie where the cute guy shows the other cute guy all the things that make him unique in his room. The talk about their favorite movies and music.

He showed me all his CD’s, DVD’s, Vinyl’s, and horror movie collection’s. I got to see the taste in music that he has. Which is very unique but I some how also know all the songs he quotes and loves. We even have the same favorite signers. He showed me his action figures thing that are collectibles. He’s just a really cute nerd, and I liked that. I adored it.

He asked if I wanted to watch a movie and I said sure. We started seeing Jason Vs Freddy. It was a good movie but I only got to see what happened in the beginning and the end because we had our own little thing we did in the middle which, honestly, happened with out even thinking about it. It just, happened. It was romantic, and I wish I could capture that feeling and take it with me everywhere.

He was falling asleep in my arms towards the end of the movie. Let me just pause here for a second. There is something about just being with someone you like and just holding them. Having them in your arms. Smelling the same smell they are. Smelling them. Being and just living at the same moment with them. Just there. Alone. I just can’t compare that feeling to anything else.

Soon while after there was a knock on the door. Since he fell asleep I walked to the door and it was his friend. She is the owner of the house and rents a room to him. She told me that her mom wanted to talk to him since she also lived there. I was a bit nervous but I woke him up and he went to go talk to them in the living room while I stayed in his room and awaited his return. I was scared, by then I knew they were upset that I was there that late.

I wasn’t wrong. He can back with a really sad face. I hugged him and told him that I was sorry. He said it wasn’t my fault. They just didn’t like it that a total stranger to them was in the house that late. I completely understand. It was late, super late. They didn’t know me. His friend only had seen me once before and her mom only just met me that night, so we did screw up there. But I still would never change anything that happened last night. It was more than perfect.

Today I texted his friend and apologized for over stepping and intruding like I did. She said that it was her mom who was the one that was over reacting but she still didn’t say it was ok so she kind of agrees with her, which is fine I respect that. But she said that she did have other issues bottled up with him that came out, but they talked after I left.

I talked to him about it and he said they established rules. No boys that late. What is late? That is still unknown at the moment. Does he still want to see me? Yes. We planned to go eat somewhere this Monday. I might even have a chance to see him this Saturday if i get to go hiking with him and his friends. I haven’t met these friends. These seem to be more active as I hear they are always hiking. I think he is going to invite me to go since they want to meet me.

Over all, my thoughts? I like him. I like him a lot. I know a lot about him. Not everything but a lot. I know him only a week now but we seemed to have skipped the, what is your favorite color? questions and went right into, what are your biggest fears and insecurities?

He told many friends about me, I have only told 2. Slowly I want to let them know I am dating but I don’t want to get ahead of myself and tell everyone then in 2 weeks tell them I am single once again. I want to be sure of this. I know I’ll get crap for saying this but its true, he’s so broken but well put together and I am well put together but broken. If that doesn’t sound tragically romantic, I don’t now what does.

I Was… Adulting

I was so out of this world productive yesterday. I was the guy version of Wonder Woman. Is that a thing? Or is that offensive? Either way I’m proud of myself. You should have seen me.

I got up super early, as I do, picked up my brother from his graveyard shift, and instead of crawling back into bed for an extra 40 mins, I got ready for work, when to Starbucks, and I even pumped some gas into my car! I know for some people these things might seem a little ordinary, but for me these are huge accomplishments.

I’m not even finished though. Work was slow so I did a half day. And instead of breaking the law by driving home anxiously at 90 mph I went, dare I say it, grocery shopping. Yes ma’am. I was adulting. Never thought I’d do it but I did. Bought some nice little veggies, ice cream because I enjoy being happy, and all that other random stuff you find in your fridge.

The party did not stop there no sir. After putting the groceries away, I did some laundry. Wait no correction, I did ALL my laundry. That’s right, maybe 3 weeks worth. I was out of control I know, I know.

Since I had to keep this train going, I decided to vacuum my car. Sit down this is going to sound wild. I cleaned my car. Yes that’s a true statement. I took out the trash that was starting to ferment in there (filled up a 13 gallon trash bag with trash), vacuumed, and because I was feeling a little sassy, I even waxed the seats and the dash board.

I don’t know what hit me honestly. I’m thinking there was something in that Starbucks I had. Who knows. But it was a very productive day. I rewarded myself with ice cream of course when I was done folding the laundry.

If only I was that productive all the time.


05/16/2019


Sunday Frustrated-Day

I. Am. Frustrated.

So sit down, shut up, and listen.

That was aggressive, I’m sorry, I’ve just ugh I don’t know, today has been a hot mess.

First, I was supposed to go help someone from church do some things, but because I really didn’t want to spend time with them and the people they invited I didn’t go. Also, my best friend invited me to a get together at the same time, but I honestly didn’t want to be around people, so canceled that real quick. Not necessarily be around people, just not socialize with them part, make sense?

Thought I’d go to Starbucks to edit, IT WAS PACKED, who knew everyone in Southern California has a weird fetish for Starbucks on a Sunday afternoon? I didn’t. I sat next to these nice woman. I asked if I could sit on the chair next to the table next to them, they said , “absolutely!” With a warm welcome like that why wouldn’t I sit down?

Then, out of shame, I didn’t even edit. I was scared they would look over and see me editing myself talking to a camera. So I just surfed the internet. A spot opened up across the store, did I move? Nope. I was so frighted that they nice ladies would think I was moving because of them. So I stayed there for thirty minutes until they left. Then, that’s when I took my chance and moved.

Once I moved, I started finally doing what I had gone there to do. Ok, good, then BAM, computer battery at 10% . Great . Just great. I know what you’re thinking, just plug it in. Well, Captain Obvious, that’s what I wanted to do. But the power outlet was right beside some dude and I was not about to tap him on the shoulder and ask if I could plug in my cord. So I left.

I went to go get an oil change because I wanted to at least do something productive today. I went to one where you don’t have to get off your car and it’s supper fast. It was a slow day for them (because everyone was probably sipping their Starbucks drinks at Starbucks) so everyone was on me and my oil change. I was out of there in less then 10 minutes. Great service, awkward goodbyes .

I come home and remember that tomorrow is Monday. I’m sorry if I just reminded you or informed you. But yes. Tomorrow is that day. Tomorrow I go to work. I dread it. If I wasn’t already frustrated enough, I’d get frustrated just by thinking that.

I literally just want to lay in bed and stare at the sealing. Is there anything much left to do?

It’s The Weekend Boi

I’m at my local Starbucks again because I live here now. I did not go to work today so its a good day. *Insert super cheerful hyped up music here*. I am semi worried about how my check is going to be when I see it next week, but I’ll worry about that later. You know, I’d rather be broke and happy, then have money and be stressed.

 

Today I have a very eventful day. One of my friends dog’s had puppies and I can’t wait to meet them. I was there for her dogs first days, I even have a picture of me with her. And now she’s all grown up and having puppies. Life moves so fast. *Gets emotional over dogs*.

 

 

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This is me with the beautiful little Bailey from two years ago

 

 

I’m also eating breakfast with her (the owner of the do not the dog lol). My diet has come and gone in these recent days. Meaning, that one day I stayed with it and the next I haven’t. But don’t worry! Its not like one day I’ll eat only veggies and the the next day down some fries and three tons of soda. No. I have been doing well and I have made my limits. I have also starting walking which is really relaxing. I like to walk alone, earphones in, music on max, and just forget about everything. Its nice, try it.

 

Also on today’s agenda. Looking for jobs. Ok that’s enough of that. 

 

At the end of the day, my church is doing this thing for the Death of Jesus (Easter type thing). So I’ll be attending that. One of my friends is having a dinner a little after and he invited me. I don’t know if I’ll go to be honest. I know they’ll have good food and I wont be able to contain myself. I might just go late that way I can go but still keep my diet integrity. Plus I love spending time with him and his family, just don’t know who else they invited. (Because I’m awkward meeting new people).

 

Tomorrow there is a church picnic as well. I’ll try my best to attend that but probably just arrive at the same time one of my other friends does because I need moral support just to be in public and around people. You guys ever get that? When you’re alone you’re weak but when you’re with your friends you really don’t give a dam? Maybe its just me, who knows. But that’s basically all I have to do. And then for Monday (which I hope never comes around) I’ll have to return to my work. Maybe JUST maybe, if I wish hard enough the building will be consumed by flames before I even have to return, but I know that’s a little stretch in reality. (My fingers are crossed though).


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Is There Such A Place ?

Yesterday after vigorously working on cutting some annoying weeds that grew in our front yard I decided to compensate myself with a nice little drink from Starbucks. There’s no other better way to pat yourself on the back right?

Blasted my music as loud as I could handle while driving there, scratch that, as loud as it went. I was freaking pumped, got my car windows tinted on Sunday and it had been a long time dream I had since I bought the car three years ago. Now since it’s paid off, and I know I’m gonna keep it, I decided to treat myself with that. And I love it.

I didn’t want to get off my car, because I’m socially awkward, so I went a little out of my way to go to a Starbucks that had a drive through. Funny thing though, if you ever got your windows tinted you know that you’re not supposed to roll down your windows. Well, my little dumb soul forgot SUNDAY NIGHT and YESTERDAY NIGHT at the Starbucks. Like wtf.

Any who, after that unfortunate event, I decide to just park and consume my Starbucks while listening to music. It was actually really relaxing. It was drizzling just a bit which made it perfect. I’m honestly tired of how much it’s been raining though. We live in California, it’s not supposed to rain here. I like the cold not the rain. Would like to live somewhere where it’s hella sunny but at the same time the wind gives you goosebumps. Is there such a place?

I don’t know where I was going with this post. Maybe it wasn’t meant to go anywhere. It’s just me rambling about nonsense. It’s all good though. The night ended very well. So that’s what counts.