I Will Do This

A while ago I told myself I was going to use the time I have right now to write a book. A book based on what I have gone through the past few years. From my sexuality to living a double life while being in a religion like cult. Both of those things still go in hand to hand and still to this day are something I am still coming to terms with.

The thing is, I wasn’t aware that it was something that was so complex. I was watching videos and I also read articles about the processes on how to write a memoir. It’s not an easy process.

I don’t want to give up though. I know that sometimes I can get discouraged very early on in the things that I want to do, but I feel the need to do this. I want to do it first of all for myself.

I have to be really honest here. I am really troubled towards where to even start. I want to tell my story and I want to be as honest as I can be. I want the truth to get out there. I want people to read and feel what I have been through. I want to document all my mistakes that I made. I know that it is my side of the story and its everything that has happened to me but that doesn’t make me any more of a saint or innocent. I made really poor decision in the past too and I want to write about those and maybe someone can learn from them just as I have learned.

The issue is where do I even start? How do I even start? What do I need to talk about? This is the first time I want to do some thing this big. What if no on wants to read it?

I over think way to much. We know that, but right now that I have the opportunity and time to do this I want to take advantage of it.

The only experience I have in writing is this blog that I have had for almost three years. Writing is my passion and I know that I am not the best of it, but maybe some day I will be.

But, I’ll do it. I will do this.